Ramblings of a Plywood Peddler

How to be a Good Bush Republican....What You Need To Believe To Be A Good Bush loving Republican
1. Jesus loves you, and shares your hatredof homosexuals and Hillary Clinton.
2. Saddam was a good guy when Reagan armedhim, a bad guy when Bush's daddy made war on him, a good guy when Cheney did business with him, but ultimately he's the worlds worst tyrant when Bush needed a "we can't find Bin Laden" diversion.
3. Trade with Cuba is wrong because thecountry is Communist, but trade with China and Vietnam is vital to a spirit of "international harmony"...
4. The United States should get out of theUnited Nations, and our highest national priority is enforcing U.N. resolutions against Iraq.
5. A woman can't be trusted with decisionsabout her own body, but multi-national corporations can make decisions affecting all mankind without regulation.
6. The best way to improve military morale is to praise the troops with quality speeches, while slashing veterans' benefits andcombat pay.7. If condoms are kept out of schools, adolescents won't have sex.
8. A good way to fight terrorism is to belittle our long-time allies, then demand their cooperation and money.
9. Providing health care to all Iraqis is sound policy, but providing health care to all Americans is socialism. HMOs and insurance companies have the best interests of the public at heart.
10. Global warming and tobacco's link to cancer are junk science, but creationism should be taught in schools.
11. A president lying about an extramarital affair is a impeachable offense, but a president lying to enlist support for a war in which thousands die is solid defense policy.
12. Government should limit itself to the powers named in the Constitution, which include banning gay marriages and censoring the Internet.
13. The public has a right to know about Hillary's cattle trades, but George Bush's driving record is none of our business.
14. Being a drug addict is a moral failing and a crime, unless you're a conservative radio host. Then it's an illness and you need our prayers for your recovery.
15. Supporting "Executive Privilege" for every Republican ever born, who will be born or who might be born (in perpetuity.)
16. What Bill Clinton did in the 1960s is of vital national interest, but what Bush did in the '80s is irrelevant.
17. Support for hunters who shoot their friends and blame them for wearing orange vests similar to those worn by the quail.

Enjoy